Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
