It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
