I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
