How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
