anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
