Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
