im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
operation have a gay friend backfired
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
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