i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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