you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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