The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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