shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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