This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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