I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize