Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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