How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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