you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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