The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Come share oat with me in your robe
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Randomize
