so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
