His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Randomize
