i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
