everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
