69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
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