Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I am puke
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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