I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
