only if we run a train.
done.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
