So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
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