Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Randomize
