YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
