If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize
