I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
