Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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