There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Randomize
