Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
