i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize