There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
