one word: firstdatebathroomanal
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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