Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize