remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
