it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I smell like Dick and happiness
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize
