We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
