She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
