I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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