I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize
