Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
They took my balls.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Randomize
