I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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