So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize