office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
