Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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