First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Randomize
