So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
