Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
