this boner is exhausting
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Randomize
