I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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